White Flag
by erinski
Summary: One Shot. Freddie is dead and Effy can't let go so she sits in her armchair for hours everyday. He visits her at 3.15am, a ghost to tell her it's okay.


I think this is going to be a One Shot. Please read my other Freffy fanfic "Heart On Your Sleeve", it got some lovely reviews :) Anyways, enjoy xoxo

_I will go down with this ship;_

_I will put my hands up and surrender;_

_There will be no white flag above my door;_

_I'm in love;_

_And always will be_

Effy sat in her armchair by her bedroom window with her legs up to her chin. The moonlight outside bathed her room in a luminous, white glow. She'd been sitting in this armchair for four hours, not moving. Her legs had become numb with being in the same position. She stared straight ahead, not blinking. She was like a statue, a small, frail, delicate little statue. Effy shivered but didn't attempt to warm herself up. She didn't care about anything anymore.

She flinched when she heard a noise outside. Slowly turning her head to look out the window, she saw nothing. The street was empty and the houses were silent and dark. It was three am, of course the street was going to be empty outside. Who would be up at this hour? Who in their right mind? Effy laughed bitterly. She wasn't in the right mind. She hadn't been for a while.

_Effy, nothing bad is going to happen._

But he was wrong, wasn't he. Something bad did happen and it was her own fucking fault. It was _her_ fault that he was gone. He'd left her by mistake. He hadn't _wanted_ to but he had. And now she was alone, with no one in this world to look after her. Her hands gripped her knees and her fingernails dug into her skin.

_Nothing bad is going to happen._

She heard the noise outside again. She wanted it to shut up. It had come at this time every night for the past three weeks. She'd had enough. She leapt from the chair, moving for the first time in four hours. A wave of emotion flooded her. She had to do something. She pulled at her bedroom curtains and they snapped off their hanger. She screamed and screamed, letting out all the hurt and anger she felt. Effy, normally so quiet and numb, was screaming loud. Her mum wasn't home so she could scream all she wanted. She threw her pillows across the room, not caring that they ripped open and a cloud of feathers burst out of it. She thrust her hands across her dressing table and let the perfume bottles crash to the floor and smash into oblivion. Grabbing the mirror on the wall, she threw it to the other side of the room, not caring that the shards of glass now covered the floor like an icy lake. Still screaming, she whipped around to hit her window, wanting to feel pain.

A lone figure was standing outside on the street, looking up at her window. The figure was slouched, hands in pockets. Effy exhaled and stared. The figure stared back. Looking at her clock, she noticed it was 3.15am. Right on schedule. Turning back towards the window, she looked out but the figure was gone. Clenching her fists, Effy wished she hadn't looked away. Maybe the figure could have stayed there for longer. Walking across the room, she felt pain in her foot. "SHIT!" she cried out, collapsing on the floor. The shards of glass from the mirror were under her and one was sticking into her foot, which was now oozing blood. Tears glistening in her eyes, she bit her lip and tried to take the glass out carefully. She deserved this. She deserved to have glass sticking out of her foot.

Effy felt something run down the back of her head. She froze.

"Go away.." she whispered. Her back tingled. Goosebumps came over her body and she tried to keep her voice level. "Go. Away," she whispered again, more defiant this time. She looked at the rest of the floor, working out how much glass she'd have to clean up. A chill went over her as she saw a photograph lying on the floor with her blood smeared over it. Picking it up, her breath caught as she looked over the faces of her and Freddie. "N-N-No.." she murmured. "NO!" she finally shouted and crunching it into a ball, she threw it away from her. Burying her face in her hands, she allowed herself to break down and cry. The moonlight was flooded around her as she wept. She opened her eyes and tried to see through her tears. The silhouette of a boy darkened the moonlight around her. "Just stop.." she choked. Her body was suddenly covered with a warmness. Looking behind her, her heart stopped when she noticed she wasn't alone.

"Freddie?"

Freddie was now sitting behind her, his arms wrapped around her, his head resting on her shoulder, his chin jutting into the crook of her neck. "Hey, you."

"W-Why have you come?"

"I always come."

"But.. I can see you properly. You're here.."

Freddie hugged her tighter. "You've hurt your foot. I had to make sure you were okay."

Tears fell down Effy's cheeks. She gripped his hands around her, trying to believe that was actually happening, it wasn't her imagination. "You're a ghost. Aren't you?" she asked.

Freddie sighed and nodded. "Yes, Effy."

"I don't want you to be a ghost. I want you to be a person. To be Freddie. Oh God, why can't you just be Freddie?"

"I am Freddie," he murmered into her hair.

"Not the real Freddie. You're a ghost."

"A ghost you can feel," he told her. To confirm this, he squeezed her hand. Effy cried harder. "I need you back. I've been so.. so alone."

"You're never alone. Never. I'm always here."

"How can I know that?"

He sighed. "I'm there when you wake up in the morning. I'm there when you're with Pandora. I'm there when you cry at night. I'm there when you're sitting in that goddamn armchair."

"How do you know about me in the armchair?" she asked.

"Because Effy. I see you. You sat there for four hours today. I wished you'd stand up and do something but you didn't. You just kept thinking- about me."

"It's hard not to. It's my fault."

He gripped her fiercely. "No it's not. Don't fucking blame yourself."

Her body shook as she cried harder. "But I do!"

"Don't!" he cried. He buried his face into her neck and kissed it roughly. She closed her eyes as she felt the familiar shape of his lips kiss beautiful patterns into her skin. She turned around and caught his lips. He groaned and kissed her more. "I've missed this.." he muttered. Effy wrapped her arms around him and kissed him harder. She pushed him onto the floor and kissed his neck. She grabbed his hands and placed them on her back, under her shirt. His hands on her skin assured her that this was real, this was happening. As she felt his tongue enter her mouth, she clung onto him, not wanting to let him go.

"Ef.." he whispered.

"No Freddie."

"I have to. I'm sorry."

"Don't go!" she shouted in desperation.

"I do Effy. I don't want to but I do."

"I'll never see you again. NO! DON'T LEAVE ME!" she screamed, grabbing him and holding onto him tightly. Her tears fell and she could feel his body shake as he cried too.

"Don't make this hard Effy.." he managed to say. She sobbed as he gently escaped from her grip and stood up. "I love you," he whispered.

Effy nodded, looking up at him. She took his hand. "I love you too."

He smiled sadly and squeezed her hand. "I'm always here. Don't forget me but don't wallow in the past."

"I need you in my present," she told him.

"I love you Effy," he said. She kept staring at him, refusing to turn away so that when she looked back, he was gone.

"Go to sleep, Effy," he said. Nodding, she stood up and not taking her eyes off him, she got under the covers. As her head hit the pillow, weariness fell over her and before she could protest, her eyes closed.

The last thing she felt was the touch of his lips on hers before he said his final goodbye.


End file.
